safety

All posts tagged safety

“Out of Dodge”

Published October 16, 2011 by Susan Woodward

“Mama, where’re we goin’?”

Driving down the road

We take one last glance before leaving it all behind.

“Don’t know yet, Baby—just away, that’s all.”

I’d half-done this before—

Half-done meaning I’d changed my mind.

Oh, sure, he’d cried,

But my weekend stand was undone

With a return to submission,

Foolishly falling into the familiar pattern of

Doting wife and

Dog on a leash

Screwing any real chance that change would or could occur.

Fear can do that, you know?

A rattling muffler brings me back

To that fueled-up car filled with only what the kids could carry—

Hell, you can always get more stuff, right?

But we only get one chance at living

And it’s hardly worth the bother with no chance to grow.

Time to head out of Dodge with the sun to our backs—

That thrilling, frightening step out…

“A Safe Place”

Published October 16, 2011 by Susan Woodward

Where can I go when I am overwhelmed?

What place is safe from my fears of the past?

Don’t tell me to just let go of them–

That doesn’t address the pain;

It merely stuffs it within where it will eventually

Writhe its way to the surface once more.

That’s not healing;

That’s avoidance.

But where can I go to collect myself when the memories flood in?

There must be running water;

Its song will soothe my soul.

Let it wash over and cleanse me with its healing power.

Summer breezes, birds and Celtic pipes replace lies and cruel words.

Trees will be free from the insects and snakes

That threaten to crawl over, around and inside of me.

Only soft leaves providing a shelter of safety adorn their branches.

Lilacs and honeysuckle replace the stench of halitosis

While a steaming blend of brewed herbs washes away

The semen forced down my throat.

I will be safe in my garden–

As long as there are four strong walls surrounding it.

Skylights in the ceiling allow me to gaze at Orion

Without the fear of being the hunted.

Passage is granted through one door

To which I alone possess the key.

Here I will gather my strength to slay the dragons of my past,

Its construction complete in the recesses of my mind.

Coming Home: Crossing that Return Threshold

Published October 16, 2011 by Susan Woodward

Close your eyes and relax.  Now take three deep breaths: one for body, one for mind, and one for spirit.  Take one last very deep breath and hold it.  Just when you think you cannot hold the breath any longer, pull in just a bit more air.  Again, when you feel as if you cannot continue holding the breath, pull in just a little more.  When you finally do release your breath, do so very slowly in a long continuous exhale until you have released all that you were holding.  Breathe slowly and deeply as you continue to relax.  Relax all the muscles of your body: your legs, your arms, your shoulders, and your jaw.  Completely relax.

Imagine that you are sinking down into the furniture, and in turn sinking through the floor.  Allow yourself to continue sinking down and down, all the while feeling completely relaxed.   You continue to sink down until you find yourself awakening after a satisfying rest.  Stretch and look upwards.  The crystals are twinkling a morning hello and it fills you with cheer, for you realize that you are almost home.  Anticipation fills you because you are anxious to share what you have experienced and learned in your absence.  Who in particular are you anxious to see again?  With whom is it you most wish to share your experiences?  Pondering the changes that have taken place in you, how do you imagine that you will be received by this person?  By others?  How does this make you feel?

Rise from your soft bed of moss and stretch your limbs as far as you can.  You search for the source of the sound that acted as a lullaby for you the previous night and soon discover that the gentle waterfall spilling into the underground lake is not far off.  Smiling, you remember this place as where you’d found many of the treasures that have helped you in your journey.  You remember wondering how these items happened to be lying in an underground cavern and now the answer comes to you.  They were purposely left by a previous traveler for the next person to find.  Not knowing who the former traveler was, you offer a few words of thanks to this benefactor.  It is certain that he/she did not know who would discover the gifts, but he/she made the choice to be of assistance to the next one to find him/her self in the cavern.  How does it make you feel to realize that someone left these tools with no thought of reward or thanks, but just the inclination to aid another?

Open your satchel and remove any contents that you believe could be of use to another in the future.  Arrange them thoughtfully and resist the urge to leave a note.  Leave them for someone else to use just as you did.  How do you feel knowing that you are providing for future travelers?  How does it make you feel to do this anonymously, without the possibility of any reward or thanks for your actions?

The only things you take with you are your initial gift, your water bottle, your notebook, and your boon.  Your load has been lightened tremendously, and the feelings in your heart reflect that.  You are truly ready to leave this place.  However, you are not quite sure of how to get out. Remembering that the previous passageway you’d taken leads to the deep pit, you know that you must find another way out.  You decide to cleanse yourself in the spray of the waterfall before tackling the business of finding an exit.  The sound of the water falling is soothing and you long to feel it splash over your head.

Enter the water and swim toward the falls.  Surprisingly, it is a very refreshing temperature and not the chill you initially expected.  Play for a bit in the water as you approach the falls.  How do you feel at this moment?  Tread water for a moment and look around you.  What do you see?  Describe the place in detail, remembering so that you may write it down when you emerge from your bath.

Coming closer to the falls, dive down below the surface and come up with the water cascading over you.  There is a large rock just beneath the surface for you to stand upon so that you may experience the full benefits of the falling water.  Let it pulsate against your scalp, invigorating you.  It soothingly pelts against the skin to massage out any remnants of weariness from the return journey.  You can feel your circulation moving freely through your body, creating new vigor and energy for this last portion of the return.  Diving off the rock and into the pooled water, swim around for a few more minutes.  Look up at the wonderful waterfall.  How do you feel?

As you are looking at it, you notice something you hadn’t seen before.   At first you cannot believe your eyes, but looking again, you are certain that it is not a mirage.  On the right-hand side of the waterfall, there appears to be a formation of crystals that looks like a ladder.  Swimming over to the edge, you look up and discover that the ladder leads to where the waterfall emerges into the cavern.  You quickly dress and retrieve your satchel.  Although you must swim back to get to the foot of the ladder, you do not mind so long as you remember to keep your satchel dry by holding it above the water.

Look up.  How high must you climb?  What is going though your mind as you gaze upwards?  How do you feel about climbing the crystal ladder?  Begin your ascent, being sure to gauge your footing along the way.  The crystals form secure hand and footholds in the wall of the cavern, so there is no fear of them dislodging.  How do you feel as you are climbing?  Are you strong enough to gaze behind you as you proceed?  Or might the height frighten you into being frozen to the spot, unable to move?  Decide whether you wish to look behind you at this point or not.  If you do look back, what do you see from this vantage point?  How does it make you feel?

The opening from which the water emerges is only a few more feet away.  Climb carefully and bring yourself atop the ledge.  The water comes from a large creek pouring into a small opening in the side of a hill.  You can see daylight at the end of the short tunnel, and you quickly scramble along the edge of the creek to avoid being caught in the current and pulled over the falls.  Emerge into the sunlight, feeling its warmth on your face upon your exit from the cavern.

Looking around, you are surprised to discover where you are.  Just across the creek is the place from which you exited at the beginning of the journey.  This is the place that had mysteriously disappeared as soon as you crossed the threshold, but here it is, waiting for your return.  How do you feel as you see this familiar place?

Quickly crossing the creek, hurry to the door and enter your special place.  You are home.  Once inside, you see that everything is as you had left it.  The one thing you had missed the most was your comfortable bed.  Lie down upon it, thankful to be home.  Gaze up at the ceiling to see the familiar compass painted there, and smile in the familiarity of home.  As you lie there, you begin to drift off into the most comfortable sleep you’ve had since leaving, even more comfortable than the luxurious bed you’d slept in after your celebration.  Nothing can compare to the comfort of home.

Curl into a comfortable position, and take a deep breath.  Feel yourself drifting away into the darkness.  Soon you begin to feel yourself rising from your very own bed in your special place.  As you rise, you become more and more aware of your surroundings, and soon you are able to sense the furniture beneath you.  This is the room from which you began this journey not so very long ago.  As you become more and more aware of the room around you, you think about how wonderful it is to have such a place as home to return to.  This feeling of satisfaction for the completion of a long journey will remain in your memory as you awaken from your rest.

Taking three deep breaths, one for body, one for mind, and one for spirit, you open your eyes to find yourself in a familiar place.

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