Must you hurt me again and again?
How will I ever know love if you constantly
Pull me in the wrong direction?
Oh, I thought I’d had it at times
But control, lust, anger and fear got in the way…
Yeah, all that directed at me
As if I were an unappealing force to be reckoned with
While I stood there taking it
But not accepting it,
How could you let me get here this time?
What is it about you
That allows me to make these same mistakes?
I thought you were so smart…
Pain so deep I can’t cry it out;
Not enough tears to wash it away,
Hanging on a “maybe” as if it meant “yes”
Only to be disappointed again,
Crying myself to sleep.
Why can’t anyone love me?
Or should I say “won’t” ‘cause love is a decision.
All deciding I’m not good enough
Either by walking away
Or else trying to change me,
Make me conform to their image of what I “ought” to be…
Not someone to love as I am, huh?
Stop looking at me like that,
Like I should know better!
Maybe if you spoke up once in a while
My heart would be spared a trampling or two!
With a cry of frustration
I lash out in my hurt,
Propelling my fist full force into your face
Only to pick glass from bleeding knuckles.